Friday, August 1st, 2003
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11:00 am - Thought for Today....
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Wednesday, July 30th, 2003
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7:23 pm - Excerpts from His first IM
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BOY OH BOY:have you ever walked in conversation before, soft in word.........almost so....that you feel the warmth of touch
ME: I think so
ME: Why do you ask
BOY OH BOY:i desire to know more of you............perhaps in word.......... we might walk....that we might know more..........if in front of you, i would see all in your eyes........all my questions answered, no words spoken............but i am not in front of you
ME: Unfortunately you are not but I am wishing you were
BOY OH BOY:often the most indepth conversation is held in silence........... beyond that which word can hold
BOY OH BOY:and i were............may i ask.....what then
BOY OH BOY:and if i were
ME: I am not sure at this moment. I have never in my life met a romantic like you.
BOY OH BOY:again.......... you are far too kind in word
BOY OH BOY: i have a cliet and must leave...............i desire to walk with you again............... may i extend my hand that you will accept
ME: ok
ME: Until then
BOY OH BOY: softly............ i pause as my one finger tip follows the lines of your face............. i come to rest upon your lower lip...........softly i turn and walk away.......... until~
BOY OH BOY: until then~
ME: I look forward to it.
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6:50 pm - OH MY GOD!!!
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Tuesday, July 29th, 2003
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7:53 pm - Sunday Date 2 & 3
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I took lunch to Mister Policeman. Over lunch I told him all about my health conditions. The only reason was that I was all crippled up and it was hard not to hide.
Date three.. Sunday evening we got all hot and heavy but I refused to finish the deed so to speak. Well that started 2 days of over analyizing on why I won't have sex with him while only knowing him for 2 days.
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(comment on this)
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7:28 pm - Dating as an Adult
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First off, I must have missed the memo stating that I was an Adult.
Let me tell you about my first date as a single women.
Through Instant Messenger I met a boy. Under hours of careful consideration, I agreed to meet him at his apartment.
The only reason I agreed is that he was a District of Columbia and his 2 young daughter's were at his apartment.
That night I met his children, he told me that he wanted a girl "Love me, Love my children"
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(comment on this)
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Tuesday, July 22nd, 2003
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8:38 pm - Yahoo Messenger!
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I have updated my profile for Yahoo Messenger. Let me tell you the wack jobs that are trying to contact me. Look at this shit.... I am copying exact transcripts from an entry I received today.
masterjune540: comb ur hair right and ur really pretty
ME: Thanks but no one asked you.
I hit the ignore button
Why bother taking the time to e-mail someone if all you are going to do is insult them
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8:36 pm - I AM BACK!!!!!
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Look out DC, I am back Cute and Single.
current mood:  amused
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Friday, April 11th, 2003
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6:06 pm - Faery Folk
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I have this unusual obsession for Faeries. Not just the boy kind. (side bar: A boy is not a boy unless he has a fruit fly)
I recently purchased a print from Amy Brown. She is absoulutely brilliant! She ranks right up there with Brian and Wendy Froud. Brian and Wendy Froud movie credits are: Labyrinth and the Dark Crystal.
The one book that turned me completely on to Faeries was the
This obsession has inspired me to dedicate my sunroom to the Faery Folk. This weekend I will be putting on the finishing touches to the sunroom that resembles a Faery Garden.
current mood:  artistic
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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2:18 pm - The Herd
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A couple of weeks ago the Herd had a night out to wish a farewell to our dear friend Brian. Brian who is in the Army Reserves got his orders to go mobile. As of this week he is in an undisclosed location here in the states. He should be leaving for the Middle east very soon. I thought that maybe you would be interested in seeing a picture from the Herds Night Out.
WE MISS YOU BRIAN!
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Thursday, April 10th, 2003
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9:29 am - FYI
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When I got in early this morning space boy came into my office and closed the door. He came around my desk and drew me close to him. He put his finger under my chin and guided my lips to his for a very romantic lingering kiss.
And I am not telling what happened next.
current mood:  hot
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Wednesday, April 9th, 2003
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3:27 pm - I told you so....
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I told you so is ringing through my ears. My heart is already tangled and ready to be broken.
Space boy dropped a bomb on me Monday letting me know that he was falling for me. I never reciprocated, thank God.
Today, another one was dropped. It was called GUILT. Lets look at the word Guilt
from The Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary here is the definition:
Main Entry: guilt
Pronunciation: 'gilt
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, delinquency, guilt, from Old English gylt delinquency
Date: before 12th century
1 : the fact of having committed a breach of conduct especially violating law and involving a penalty; broadly : guilty conduct
2 a : the state of one who has committed an offense especially consciously b : feelings of culpability especially for imagined offenses or from a sense of inadequacy : SELF-REPROACH
3 : a feeling of culpability for offenses
Better yet let's look at the word guilty
Main Entry: guilty
Pronunciation: 'gil-tE
Function: adjective
Inflected Form(s): guilt·i·er; -est
Date: before 12th century
1 : justly chargeable with or responsible for a usually grave breach of conduct or a crime
2 obsolete : justly liable to or deserving of a penalty
3 a : suggesting or involving guilt b : aware of or suffering from guilt
I expected this to happen but I expected it to happen right before the act not now. The funny thing is that he wants a little rendezvous' tomorrow morning. How can you tell me that all of the sudden you have morals but still want to play?
Here is his exact words:
"morals.. sadly. a spur of the moment thing is one thing but planning like this is another.. I don't know..."
Guys are more fickle than girls.
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Tuesday, April 8th, 2003
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8:14 am - Mr. Anonymous
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To my 2 readers:
The postings from Mr. Anonymous are from an opinionated person from may past. He, obviously, has forgotten what I was like, especially in the bedroom. I gave him this site address because he was wondering why I never opened up to him. I guess he has gotten more than what he bargained for. Let me tell you this, his posts are going to be well worth the time. He is a great guy but sometimes his arrogance gets in the way.
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Thursday, April 3rd, 2003
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8:13 am - FOR THE RECORD
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Just for the record: I am not "in love" with space boy. I am just falling for him. Hopefully I can catch myself before I do.
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Wednesday, April 2nd, 2003
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8:43 am - I Broke the Cardinal Rule
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How did I do this? Everyone knows you just play with unavailable men. You never, I repeat never, fall for them.
I was prepared that if and when this started to complicated our real lives (a.k.a. Our home and Family) that I would just bail. Sounds reasonable enough. Unfortunately I wasn't prepared for emotions to complicate our little fantasy world. How did I let this happen? I have been the other woman as long as I have dated. I never let emotions to interfere with play time.
All of this and we haven't really fooled around.
Space Boy what kind of spell did you place on me?
current mood:  surprised
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Friday, March 28th, 2003
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4:32 pm - Frustrated Once Again
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Mister Air -n- Space boy did it once again. He got me sexually aroused and then I got nothing. All I got was a little peck on the lips today.
After many questions on fantasies and positioning this is the conversation we had:
Me:So what's gotten into you today? You have been very curious, much more than the usual.
Him:I do know, I want to do more for u, to make it rain and if thats what you want, so do I.
Me:So What is the necessary rain dance I can do for you.
Him:I don't know you tell me that's what makes me rain is to hear what makes you rain and trying to make it come true.
What the hell kind of answer is that? What do guys expect from us? They want to know what turns us on but won't share. And another thing, I am I sole believer that when you are intimate with someone that you should express your arousal. Because if you do not make a sound that means it ain't good. I am tired of hearing at a later time how excited I got you. It kills me that a mans dick is hard but you do not know why. What did you do to get it there? He tells me it is my very existance. That is total BS. If I nibble on your ear please make so gesture to let me know if you like it. Because if you don't I am going to move on, and I do not want to hear afterwards "Why did you stop?".
Humph... Me
current mood:  grumpy
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8:28 am - Air -n-Space Boy
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This is the nickname I have given my latest obsession. I have been having cyber-sex with a very married with children colleague. We basically e-mail each other our fantasies. Sometimes we even talk about if we were to have the opportunity to get together what we would do to each other. These e-mails have been smoking this week. The state of arousal has been out of control.
Due to medications, I have lost my sex drive. Actually, I only had sex once in the past year. Its pitiful, I know. His words a clearly found my sex drive. To the point of no return. It one of those things that once you have a "O" you have to ask for an encore performance. No wonder why the rabbit's motor died on me. Lets all give air -n- space boy a round of applau
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Thursday, March 27th, 2003
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3:41 pm - Agony
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A friend of mine was listening to a Pet Shop Boys album when he heard the song Try it (I'm in love with a married man), he instantly thought of me.
I thought I would share pieces of the lyrics.
I think of you each day
I think of you at night
Do you think about me
When you make love to your wife
Do you think of us on weekends
when you are with your family
Are you lonely when you are with her
and do you ever long for me?
I do not love this married man but I can't help obsessing over the thought of the relationship if it would go beyond cybersex what it would be like
current mood:  curious
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Wednesday, March 26th, 2003
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6:09 pm - My Marriage
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I have been on a roller coaster ride throughout my six years of marriage. I do love my husband but I am not "in love" with him. There is something lacking and at this point I have no idea what. I have strayed a couple of times. It has been a very rocky road.
Health---I may look healthy on the outside but internally I am a mess. I have been battling health problems since birth. I do not hide this from anyone especially those that are directly affected by it. I ran down the long list with my husband on our second date.
My husband is a very needy person, while I am a very strong independent women. Him being needy never bothered me until the times that I need him. My husbands way of dealing with the health condition of the moment is to turn his back on me.
Don't get me wrong he is a good man. He does treats me wonderfully. He helps around the house when I can not. My family says that I am very fortunate to have a man like h
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Tuesday, March 25th, 2003
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11:39 am - Mothers Advice
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Did you ever go to your mom for advice?
I recently told my mother that I wasn't made to have a monogamous relationship. Once I defined what monogamous meant she told me that it is because I haven't met the right person.
Why didn't someone tell me that when I was 24 and walking down the aisle? It has been 6 l-o-n-g years and now she gives me advice. Thanks MOM!
current mood:  disappointed
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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Friday, March 21st, 2003
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8:23 pm - Quote of the Day
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If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else. - Laurence J. Peter
The story of my life.
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